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Being unemployed is never fun, however when you start looking forward to watching Family Feud and reruns of Match Game, that's when you know you gotta get your ass in gear and pick up a friggen hobby. 

I am technically employed, I'll be teaching the masses how to converse in English. It's part time until more clients start to pile up, and for those who know me these clients are in for a treat. I am not your typical tutor that will be by the book with exercises of gerunds and dangling participles, rather I like to shoot the shit with my clients and let them have fun in their lessons. I do this because it makes my life easier, and it masks the fact that my spelling and grammar are horrendous. But don't tell them that heehee...

So anyways these past five days were interesting, and yes I apologize for taking my sweet ass time in posting a new blog. I told you I'm lazy! 

I ended up applying to about three bars, all of which were not looking or wanted me to come in the next day for an "interview." I always wondered what this "interview" would entail...do they bring out a measuring tape and get my personal digits? Because I highly doubt if my knowledge of mixology will be of any consequence...not that I have such knowledge but you get my drift. I came home feeling gross and short changed, I'm worth better than this aren't I? After a few hours and a couple smokes I started to believe it, and had the whole notion of bar tending out of my head.  Plus I never got a call back anyway so whatever. 

Next day I had my interview with the ESL president and we had a nice informative discussion about client tutor policies and what to expect out of our contracts. I'm pretty excited and I'm looking forward to building a clientele, especially since they will all be closer to home.  

The weekend was spent visiting friends and keeping them company. I pride myself on my circle of friends, they are pretty eclectic and varied. Although sometimes some friends I can't mesh too well with others because they either have no social tact whatsoever, or they just don't get along as much due to past differences. But nothing horrendous though, no cat fights or tire slashings. I can't see myself being friends with someone who refuses to burst their bubble of ignorant bliss and realize that there are so many different scenes out there and that just because these people are not from your part of town, not your nationality, or listen to different music as you, doesn't mean they are someone not worthy of your time. This mentality is one of the major reasons why I couldn't stand high school. Many of the people I encountered there have the same reasoning to this day, even after college, university, and work.  I try to steer clear from them...

Now because I'm dirt broke I decided to spend the other day at Chapters and read the new releases. I finished He's Just Not That Into You in 3 hours, and my the epiphanies and revelations I had. The book is written by two of the head writers of Sex and the City and it basically is formatted in a question and answer style with commentaries at the end of each section.  It's funny, truthful, and painfully honest. My love life so far has been filled with shortcomings and false promises.  Not that I'm giving up on it all, hell I'm not even 25, but I've learned so far that I will not be put in a position of waiting anymore. Either waiting for a date, a call, an ounce of recognition.  I'm a naturally bubbly person, I will chat with anyone and be the life of the party by the end of the night. So being approached is not the issue, it's keeping them interested. But then you have to ask yourself why should you have to fight to keep that person interested in you when CLEARLY he should see just how awesome you are and grovel at your feet! It's tough to condition yourself into believing that it's not you, it's him. Granted being closed off from society and sabotaging any sort of connection with the opposite sex won't help you at all, and that is definitely something to change about yourself. I unfortunately know a few people who still ward off emotional attachment yet bitch about never finding the right person or how the right person DID come along, but didn't stay...boggles the mind. So I've made a promise to myself to not settle and wait...I know for sure temptation will set it and excuses that will feel perfectly just and understandable(I'm so busy at work, my parents are annoying the hell out of me, I am the new ambassador of Lithuania) will only be excuses to not hurt my feelings...and to not see me.  

I can hear my mother cackling to Gene Rayburn of Match Game, and bellowing for me to join her...maybe I should start scrapbooking...

How low can you go?

So I just got home and it's 1:30 in the morning. Saw Martha and I told her about my current financial destitution and my desperate need to find a job, any job.  I'm not particularly satisfied about the outcome of this evening but I really have no choice at the moment. 

I will be a barmaid soon.

Now before ya'll start telling me that nothing is wrong with working at a bar and a lot of people do it for the cash and blah blah blah, I want to just let it be known that I have had visions of grandeur of me being a bartender and making crazy tips. But only on my spare time. 

In this case, because I have been searching for a full time job since July of last year, desperate times call for desperate measure.  I used to work for a major Canadian publication, but only as a part time office assistant...pretty much someone who did the grunt work for everyone else. But I was happy with it because I knew it would be a good experience and it was a foot in the door for something better. Then the recession hit, and I was let go.  Bills started pilling up and I found myself working for a scam telemarketing company offering medical plans to hicks in the states. 

I wanted to gauge out my eye balls, shove pencils in my ears, and spew the blood all over my 23 year old "boss" then throw myself outside the un-openable windows. It wasn't fun. 

So I quit after 6 days.  

Since then I have created files with three major job placement agencies, applied to on average 5 job postings a day and have been left empty handed. 

Unfortunately my french is pretty crap so that is the major thing that is holding me back. It is of course my fault...I mean hell i've been back in this country for ten years now I should be pretty fluent. But alas I am not, so something has to give.

Anyway, chatting it up with Martha over a drink we decide that I should start asking around at the local bars downtown as well as one closer to my house. They all want me to come in tomorrow and speak to their managers. I would prefer to work downtown because at least I have a lower risk of bumping into someone I went to high school with at the bar closer to my house, that would be horrendous.  I've escaped these people for a reason and to see them there would not be pleasant. 

Ok this post looks pretty grim and pathetic but I don't want you guys to think I'm whining but you guys have to agree this is pretty discouraging.  I just hope 2009 will bring better news and better opportunities beyond "what can I get you boys tonight?" 

My aunt who likes to think of herself as a "mystic" told my mother that this year I will meet someone who will jumpstart my writing career and become very successful.  Right now I'm putting my hopes on those Bingo scratchies that I so love to buy...

Wish me luck kids.

By the way...do you think I'll look good in a skirt? Because damn I'm going to have to get used to it!

It starts...

Considering I want a career in writing I found it apt to start a blog. I kinda had one back in high school which showcased my dorky goth interests but that only lasted two posts.  I'm wary of blogs, I tend to get lazy...no wait, scratch that...I'm ALWAYS lazy. But I think this will be a fun way to just chew the rag and open the window to my little world of dementia. 

Some say they live vicariously through my life, you be the judge of that.

Enjoy!